"Mum!" calls my 12 year old. "Look what I've done!" He proceeds to show me how he's found a programme on his laptop that gives me a green screen. This means he can make lots of special effects, for him meaning making his own dinosaur or supernatural film on his you tube channel. He goes into vast detail of what he has to do to make it work and if I'm honest, my ears shut down a little as most of what he is saying is going straight over my head! However, despite my lack of understanding, I love that he is so motivated to find out new things and create amazing videos. We've only be HEing him since September and it's all quite new to him. I have to admit that I have wobbly days where I wish he was writing endless stories or drawing endless pictures that he used to do prior to leaving school... but then I realise that despite it only being 9 months, he has grown up so much as a person. The little boy who left school is no more. He may only be 12 years old, but he has grown so much as a person that he doesn't even resemble the boy in Year 6 less than a year ago. And that makes me feel so proud.
"Mum!" calls my 14 year old. "I can't do it!" She looks up at me from her chair in despair. "I hate geography! Why do we even have to do GCSEs!? I just want to be a child and do child things. Why do I have to rush to grow up?" My daughter left school nearly 2 years ago due to severe anxiety. Despite this she was very academic (in the sense of she just naturally did well at all subjects - but loved none of them). Since leaving school I've tried to convince her to take a more relaxed hands-on approach to learning. Telling her if she wants GCSEs a bit later she can choose one or two a year and go from there. But she's so stuck in the school way that she wants to take at least 5 and start studying them now to sit the exams in summer 2019. "But it's so boring!" she says. "My life is all about GCSEs and I just hate it!". So I tell her that she can change that. She chose to do her GCSEs now but she can go a different route if she wants. She can do some practical courses for now and maybe go to college to do vocational courses alongside English and Maths when she's ready... but due to her anxiety the thought of college terrifies her. The thought of sitting her exams as an external candidate terrifies her too. As a mum I am beside myself with worry. What if she bottles out of sitting any exams AND going to college... what then?? I will feel like I've failed her. But right now I can't think of that. I just have to help to guide her in the right way so that she can find her passion. That's what I'm here for. She's only 14. She has time to decide what she wants to do and the jump between 14 and 16 is huge with regards to maturity, confidence and life goals. So I will sit and wait. Help her to experience a variety of things and have trust that she will figure it out in her own way.
"Mummy!! Look at what I made!!" calls my 5 year old. "I made a "hostipal" from lego!" and he proceeds to tell me at great length all of the pieces he used to make it. "Can you help me make a dock, like at the harbour?" I was just about to grab my notebook and sit down with a cuppa to jot some points down for an article I had an idea on. But his expectant face looks up at me and I cave in. "Ok, I'll help you". We spend the next hour searching through endless piles of lego bricks trying to find the perfect ones to make into a dock. By the time we finish my tummy is rumbling loudly. "Do you want lunch?" I ask hauling myself up off the floor. "Not yet" he replies tipping yet another box of lego pieces all over the floor.
I walk into the kitchen and open the fridge.
"Mum!" Calls my 14yr old. "Can you help?" I grab the lettuce from the fridge, put it on the side and go to her. She asks me to explain a question in her book. I read it three times before I understand myself and then attempt to explain it to her. She looks at me confused so I go back through the passage and show her examples of what it wants. "Oh, yeah." she says, finally understanding. I return to the kitchen and open the fridge once more. I take out some more salad, some dressing and some hard boiled eggs I cooked earlier. I put them on the side and go to fetch a plate.
"Mum!" calls my 12 year old. "I can't reach the box in my cupboard". So I go up the stairs to help he get said box down from the top of his wardrobe.
I return to the kitchen and begin to put the salad on to the plate.
"Mummy! Can you help me wipe my bum!" my five year old yells from upstairs. "I can do it, but can you check".
"Yes ok" I call back, tummy making loud gurgling noises now and my body starting to feel a little weak due to hunger.
Back in the kitchen I peel the shell off the egg and slice it and place it on the salad.
"What's for lunch?" says my 12 year old as he slumps into the kitchen.
"Whatever you want." I reply. "I'm doing salad, do you want some?"
He turns his nose up and shuffles over to the fridge. Can I make bacon sandwiches?"
I'm trying to lose some weight but I could KILL for a bacon sandwich right now, but that doesn't mean he can't have one. "yes that's fine" I say reluctantly. I pour a small amount of low fat dressing on to my salad and take my plate to the table.
"I'm hungry now" says my 5 year old. "Can I have a wrap?" I debate telling him he now has to wait, but seeing as he only ever has butter in it, and he likes salad too, I decide it will quicker and more pleasant if I just quickly make it and he can join me at the table. So I do that.
As we sit down again to eat, my 14 year old comes in while on the phone to her friend. "I'm just grabbing this" she says taking a hard boiled egg out of the fridge and begin peeling it. "I'll be back for lunch in a minute".
Once I finish my meal I stand up to visit the toilet. "Mum" says my 12 year old..... and 15 minutes later I manage to close the bathroom door and breathe a sigh of relief as I finally have a bit of privacy. Spoken too soon, I suddenly hear a knock at the door "Mum!..."
Showing posts with label siblings. Show all posts
Showing posts with label siblings. Show all posts
Saturday, 20 May 2017
Saturday, 4 February 2017
"What do you do all day?"
I was asked this recently when discussing our life with a friend. This was a friend who doesn't quite "get" home education. And who can blame them? I didn't get it either before we started it. Not really. I was interested in it, and I was jealous of the people who did it. No ties to school runs and expensive half term holidays. Time to enjoy their children before they grew up and flew the nest. But I didn't really understand what it involved.
Since we've started home educating, I've realised that there are generally two types of people who don't "get" HE. The first type are the ones who think our children sit at home all day not doing anything constructive and don't see anyone else in the outside world ("but how will they learn how to socialise??" and the second type are the ones who think the children are chained to the dining table spending 6hrs a day writing in exercise books while I stand in front of them "teaching".
Well, maybe there are those extremes in the HE world, but I am yet to meet anyone who's home ed looks like that. Our reality is this:
I have three children aged 4 1/2, 11 and 14.
My 14yr old has decided on the subjects she'd like to take at GCSE level and has always been a bit of a book-work type of person and so she is quite happy working through ks3 text books. In September we will buy the correct text books for the exams she would like to sit. These will be English IGCSE, Maths GCSE, Geography IGCSE, History GCSE and Biology IGCSE. We'll buy the text books and those along with past papers and various online resources and you tube videos she'll hopefully feel prepared enough to sit the exams in 2019. A lot of home educators don't do them all at once. Often they take one or two each year over, maybe, 3 yrs so that there is much less work and pressure to get the work done. However, my daughter is more of a "let's get it all out of the way all at once" type of person - possibly a bit like her mother!! So she's opted to do all 5 at once - but take 2yrs to study for them. She also does 2 sessions a week working alongside a football coach, coaching children aged between 4 and 11 which is what she loves most of all. Although she doesn't see it "education" she also comes along with the rest of us for trips out which I am sure she learns more from than she realises! (See below!)
My 11yr old is much less workbook-y. He learns best by hands on or documentaries. He uses a maths programme called conquermaths which he's really enjoying (considering maths was always his worst subject at school) alongside Prodigy Maths which is a game based mental maths type game. Again, he'll do this voluntarily without protest which is a huge plus in my eyes! He is a natural writer and although we do use CGP books for English, he also supplements this with his own story writing. Science we cover in various forms such as Mystery Science which is an online lesson with hands on experiments to complete as well as some written work. We also watch endless documentaries which cover a huge variety of topics relating to science, geography and history. He's also just become interested in hiking and so we go for regular walks locally in the countryside and he'll soon be the one reading the OS maps instead of me. What better way to learn geography skills than getting out there and having weekly (or more than weekly) field trips. These trips often involve stopping off at historic places of interest whether it be old churches, English Heritage castles or just for some stone skimming on the beach! Talking of beaches, in the warmer months he has his swimming lessons here (when I say lessons, I mean he spends hours having fun in the water but over the summer managed to really improve his strength in swimming) but in the cooler weather we go to the local pool which has discounted HE swimming sessions. Also at the beach we do lots of exploring of the shoreline or rockpools and enjoy identifying things we have found along the way.
My son is a keen photographer and artist and so he often will be seen taking endless photographs of the scenery we've come across or the items he has found and then sketching them once he gets home.
On top of this, he has extra curricular groups/lessons that he attends - drama, parkour and football.
My 4yr old would have started school last September if we had sent him, although he is not legal school starting age until September this year. His education is mainly play based. We do have our routines such as bedtime stories every night and a reading programme called pippoplearning most days. He also chooses to go on Teach your monster to read as and when he wants (often a couple of times a week) and has also recently got interested in minecraft. But mainly he plays. He plays with small world toys such as trains and tracks, cars and his road mat, mini people or character figures, construction toys such as lego, zoobs, wooden blocks and wood and nails! He's also following in his brother's footsteps and is very into drawing at the moment which I am encouraging no end as the more he draws, the more he develops his hand muscles ready for writing. He has written a few things when he's asked to copy something but right now I'm not pushing the writing as he loves drawing so much and feel this is enough at age 4 to develop the correct muscles. He watches tv and you tube - he's so interested in things and how they work that he'll do anything in his power to find out the answers to his questions. As I type this he is watching "Britain's Secret Seas" a bbc documentary which he is absolutely glued to right now, but also watches various cbeebies programmes - the ones with "real" information being his favourite such as "Do you know", "I can cook" and "Octonauts". There's also a programme called "Magic School Bus" on Netflix which at first seems like an annoying Scooby Doo style retro cartoon. However, on closer inspection, it has a huge amount of scienctific teaching that goes on there - some things both myself and my 11yr old didn't even know ourselves so often we find ourselves all watching it as a family. You tube favourites also include "Come Outside" with the lovely Pippin and Auntie Mabel.
On top of all of the above, he also obviously joins us in our walks and explorations, swimming and football. He also does his own two dance classes and gymnastics. All of which he adores. We also meet up with friends at least once or twice a week for play dates either outside or in play centres. He mixes with other children most days and so do my older children either through groups or going out with friends and so I can honestly say Home Ed children really don't miss out socially. In fact, in my own children's point of view, they have a more active social life than most school children who have to sit next to whoever they're told to rather than a friend of choice.
At the weekend we do normal family things once their dad is home - zoo trips, country walks, chores such as shopping and DIY.
Would I change my life? Never. It is the best thing we've ever done!! xx
Since we've started home educating, I've realised that there are generally two types of people who don't "get" HE. The first type are the ones who think our children sit at home all day not doing anything constructive and don't see anyone else in the outside world ("but how will they learn how to socialise??" and the second type are the ones who think the children are chained to the dining table spending 6hrs a day writing in exercise books while I stand in front of them "teaching".
Well, maybe there are those extremes in the HE world, but I am yet to meet anyone who's home ed looks like that. Our reality is this:
I have three children aged 4 1/2, 11 and 14.
My 14yr old has decided on the subjects she'd like to take at GCSE level and has always been a bit of a book-work type of person and so she is quite happy working through ks3 text books. In September we will buy the correct text books for the exams she would like to sit. These will be English IGCSE, Maths GCSE, Geography IGCSE, History GCSE and Biology IGCSE. We'll buy the text books and those along with past papers and various online resources and you tube videos she'll hopefully feel prepared enough to sit the exams in 2019. A lot of home educators don't do them all at once. Often they take one or two each year over, maybe, 3 yrs so that there is much less work and pressure to get the work done. However, my daughter is more of a "let's get it all out of the way all at once" type of person - possibly a bit like her mother!! So she's opted to do all 5 at once - but take 2yrs to study for them. She also does 2 sessions a week working alongside a football coach, coaching children aged between 4 and 11 which is what she loves most of all. Although she doesn't see it "education" she also comes along with the rest of us for trips out which I am sure she learns more from than she realises! (See below!)
My 11yr old is much less workbook-y. He learns best by hands on or documentaries. He uses a maths programme called conquermaths which he's really enjoying (considering maths was always his worst subject at school) alongside Prodigy Maths which is a game based mental maths type game. Again, he'll do this voluntarily without protest which is a huge plus in my eyes! He is a natural writer and although we do use CGP books for English, he also supplements this with his own story writing. Science we cover in various forms such as Mystery Science which is an online lesson with hands on experiments to complete as well as some written work. We also watch endless documentaries which cover a huge variety of topics relating to science, geography and history. He's also just become interested in hiking and so we go for regular walks locally in the countryside and he'll soon be the one reading the OS maps instead of me. What better way to learn geography skills than getting out there and having weekly (or more than weekly) field trips. These trips often involve stopping off at historic places of interest whether it be old churches, English Heritage castles or just for some stone skimming on the beach! Talking of beaches, in the warmer months he has his swimming lessons here (when I say lessons, I mean he spends hours having fun in the water but over the summer managed to really improve his strength in swimming) but in the cooler weather we go to the local pool which has discounted HE swimming sessions. Also at the beach we do lots of exploring of the shoreline or rockpools and enjoy identifying things we have found along the way.
My son is a keen photographer and artist and so he often will be seen taking endless photographs of the scenery we've come across or the items he has found and then sketching them once he gets home.
On top of this, he has extra curricular groups/lessons that he attends - drama, parkour and football.
My 4yr old would have started school last September if we had sent him, although he is not legal school starting age until September this year. His education is mainly play based. We do have our routines such as bedtime stories every night and a reading programme called pippoplearning most days. He also chooses to go on Teach your monster to read as and when he wants (often a couple of times a week) and has also recently got interested in minecraft. But mainly he plays. He plays with small world toys such as trains and tracks, cars and his road mat, mini people or character figures, construction toys such as lego, zoobs, wooden blocks and wood and nails! He's also following in his brother's footsteps and is very into drawing at the moment which I am encouraging no end as the more he draws, the more he develops his hand muscles ready for writing. He has written a few things when he's asked to copy something but right now I'm not pushing the writing as he loves drawing so much and feel this is enough at age 4 to develop the correct muscles. He watches tv and you tube - he's so interested in things and how they work that he'll do anything in his power to find out the answers to his questions. As I type this he is watching "Britain's Secret Seas" a bbc documentary which he is absolutely glued to right now, but also watches various cbeebies programmes - the ones with "real" information being his favourite such as "Do you know", "I can cook" and "Octonauts". There's also a programme called "Magic School Bus" on Netflix which at first seems like an annoying Scooby Doo style retro cartoon. However, on closer inspection, it has a huge amount of scienctific teaching that goes on there - some things both myself and my 11yr old didn't even know ourselves so often we find ourselves all watching it as a family. You tube favourites also include "Come Outside" with the lovely Pippin and Auntie Mabel.
On top of all of the above, he also obviously joins us in our walks and explorations, swimming and football. He also does his own two dance classes and gymnastics. All of which he adores. We also meet up with friends at least once or twice a week for play dates either outside or in play centres. He mixes with other children most days and so do my older children either through groups or going out with friends and so I can honestly say Home Ed children really don't miss out socially. In fact, in my own children's point of view, they have a more active social life than most school children who have to sit next to whoever they're told to rather than a friend of choice.
At the weekend we do normal family things once their dad is home - zoo trips, country walks, chores such as shopping and DIY.
Would I change my life? Never. It is the best thing we've ever done!! xx
Thursday, 1 January 2015
Feeling thankful
Wow!
What an amazing end to 2014. We have been given so much these past couple of months I don't even know where to begin. My parents in law moved house so were getting rid of some things so we have inherited a new washing machine and a tumble drier!
Ok, so to some people these may not sound that exciting - but to us (ok, me) it is wonderful! Our own washing machine is truly rubbish and never makes the washing smell fresh. Plus with five of us and it being winter our entire house is constantly looking like a laundry which isn't ideal when the house isn't huge and as I say, there are five of us (one of us a 2yr old with big toys) so it's pretty busy anyway.
Plus my lovely lovely parents have given us some money to buy a new car. This is much needed as although our current 14yr old car is still going, it is very much on it's last legs (or wheels as it were!). The suspension has totally gone and to say it's an uncomfortable ride is an understatement. Also, with my dad being in his 80s we really felt the next car we got was a 7 seater so that if there comes a time that he can no longer drive (mum doesn't drive), it really would be a help if we had enough space to fit them both in as well as us all.
So that is our current aim. To find a car for a good price that will last us til at least the big two grow up enough to make their own way... which actually doesn't feel like it will be that long! Eeek! N is now 12, C is 9 and F is 2yrs9mths. It's all going so quickly.
We've had a small blip with N recently. She's had a friend who wasn't really very nice to her which seemed to be making her constantly angry, especially towards C. A couple of weeks ago he was really not kind to her at all and she has decided not to see him or speak to him any more. I think it's such a brave brave thing for her to have decided as this is someone she has known for several years and been very close to for the past year. I do feel she needed to do this for herself. He seemed to be making her not feel good about herself and that's not a good thing. I do feel sorry for this boy though as I feel he's a bit lost somehow as he feels he needs to threaten his friends if they don't do as he says.
Anyway, since she has stopped seeing him we seem to have our lovely little girl back. She's been so much happier and content. No anger towards her brother and eagerly wanting to do things with us again rather than wanting to just sit in doors or be out with this "friend". She suffers with anxiety at times so it could be partly that she is off of school for the Christmas holidays, but I feel it is more than that - I asked how she felt about not seeing him and she said that although she's a bit sad, she also feels free and happier. It's sad that she continued to see him regularly even though he made her feel that way... but it's also great of her to give their friendship a really good go before she walked away. I love that girl so much.My children really do mean the world to me.
DREAMS FOR 2015
We went to our local wildlife park today for the first time in ages. We all had such a lovely time despite the cold grey day. On the way there we talked about our hopes for this years. We agreed to do more family things and adventures which I'm really looking forward to. I'm going to compile a list (oh how I love lists!) of things we must do this year so watch this space for thing we want to tick off our list.
I've been reading a book called "Feel the Fear and Do it anyway" by Susan Jeffers that my lovely friend K lent me. It's such a fascinating book and makes total sense. Not sure how much it is going to work yet but it's already got me thinking about how I don't make the most of other areas of my life. Right now it's the house and the children and not much else. The book encourages you to remember the other parts of your life too and to give 100% to everything you do... which to be honest, I find really hard. I find I flit between jobs and don't give 100% to anything I do right now whether it be time spent with the children, household jobs, work or anything else for that matter (not that I have much time for anything else which is part of the problem).
So my dreams for 2015 include being there 100% for the children but also making time for other things in my life, even if only for an hour a day... but during that hour I will put 100% into it. I guess it's like mindfulness (another subject I would like to read up on).
Here's to a wonderful 2015!
What an amazing end to 2014. We have been given so much these past couple of months I don't even know where to begin. My parents in law moved house so were getting rid of some things so we have inherited a new washing machine and a tumble drier!
Ok, so to some people these may not sound that exciting - but to us (ok, me) it is wonderful! Our own washing machine is truly rubbish and never makes the washing smell fresh. Plus with five of us and it being winter our entire house is constantly looking like a laundry which isn't ideal when the house isn't huge and as I say, there are five of us (one of us a 2yr old with big toys) so it's pretty busy anyway.
Plus my lovely lovely parents have given us some money to buy a new car. This is much needed as although our current 14yr old car is still going, it is very much on it's last legs (or wheels as it were!). The suspension has totally gone and to say it's an uncomfortable ride is an understatement. Also, with my dad being in his 80s we really felt the next car we got was a 7 seater so that if there comes a time that he can no longer drive (mum doesn't drive), it really would be a help if we had enough space to fit them both in as well as us all.
So that is our current aim. To find a car for a good price that will last us til at least the big two grow up enough to make their own way... which actually doesn't feel like it will be that long! Eeek! N is now 12, C is 9 and F is 2yrs9mths. It's all going so quickly.
We've had a small blip with N recently. She's had a friend who wasn't really very nice to her which seemed to be making her constantly angry, especially towards C. A couple of weeks ago he was really not kind to her at all and she has decided not to see him or speak to him any more. I think it's such a brave brave thing for her to have decided as this is someone she has known for several years and been very close to for the past year. I do feel she needed to do this for herself. He seemed to be making her not feel good about herself and that's not a good thing. I do feel sorry for this boy though as I feel he's a bit lost somehow as he feels he needs to threaten his friends if they don't do as he says.
Anyway, since she has stopped seeing him we seem to have our lovely little girl back. She's been so much happier and content. No anger towards her brother and eagerly wanting to do things with us again rather than wanting to just sit in doors or be out with this "friend". She suffers with anxiety at times so it could be partly that she is off of school for the Christmas holidays, but I feel it is more than that - I asked how she felt about not seeing him and she said that although she's a bit sad, she also feels free and happier. It's sad that she continued to see him regularly even though he made her feel that way... but it's also great of her to give their friendship a really good go before she walked away. I love that girl so much.My children really do mean the world to me.
DREAMS FOR 2015
We went to our local wildlife park today for the first time in ages. We all had such a lovely time despite the cold grey day. On the way there we talked about our hopes for this years. We agreed to do more family things and adventures which I'm really looking forward to. I'm going to compile a list (oh how I love lists!) of things we must do this year so watch this space for thing we want to tick off our list.
I've been reading a book called "Feel the Fear and Do it anyway" by Susan Jeffers that my lovely friend K lent me. It's such a fascinating book and makes total sense. Not sure how much it is going to work yet but it's already got me thinking about how I don't make the most of other areas of my life. Right now it's the house and the children and not much else. The book encourages you to remember the other parts of your life too and to give 100% to everything you do... which to be honest, I find really hard. I find I flit between jobs and don't give 100% to anything I do right now whether it be time spent with the children, household jobs, work or anything else for that matter (not that I have much time for anything else which is part of the problem).
So my dreams for 2015 include being there 100% for the children but also making time for other things in my life, even if only for an hour a day... but during that hour I will put 100% into it. I guess it's like mindfulness (another subject I would like to read up on).
Here's to a wonderful 2015!
Monday, 1 July 2013
Loving...
Loving that my baby boy is learning so much every day. He's nearly 15 months now and understands so much. This past week he's been understanding that it's not kind to bite other people and he now takes himself off to have a "think" at the back door and when he's ready he returns to give his victim a kiss to say sorry. His bites are getting less frequent to so something somewhere is sinking on.
Also loving the fact that just today we were looking at his book together and he began copying the animal sounds when we got to each page. :-) :-)
Also loving the fact that just today we were looking at his book together and he began copying the animal sounds when we got to each page. :-) :-)
I also love how he's learnt how to go and collect his step if he needs to be that tiny bit taller!! :-)
I love how close my three children are these days.
I'm just loving being a mama right now!!! :-)
Friday, 5 April 2013
Friends...
Well, so far so good...dh and I are managing wonderfully so far not to shout. We are saying "yes" to the children much more than no (unless for good reason obviously) and add a result we've had a peaceful few days. Today has been a little more difficult as I've not been sleeping well so I'm SO tired... but I've still not shouted, and neither have they.
We had a lovely day yesterday. Dh stayed home to get on with garden jobs while I took the children to our local wildlife park with my best friend Dawn and her two children A who is 14 and R who is 8. It was bitterly cold but being with our very best friends we could have been in a cardboard box and still had a good time. I met Dawn when I was 11 when we first started secondary school. We've been through a lot together and still extremely close now. She's kind of my soul mate. Someone I can spend hours with chatting about nothing and never get bored. Time whizzes by and in a flash its time to go home.
Anyway, it was totally freezing all day with snow on and off but the children were having such a great time and to be honest,.. So were we despite the cold. After six hours of pacing the park in minus temperatures and an hour standing waiting for then to finish in the play area, we really had to go home. Our bodies could no longer cope with the cold.
We said or goodbyes with the agreement that Dawn and the children would come to our house for the day next Friday. They live an hour and a half away... Where we used to live... So visits are normally few and far between... And with N and her recent anxieties it's been hard to get her to travel more than half an hour.
I'm assuming it was due to the cold of yesterday that made me wake up feeling like I felt this morning. Still freezing. Achey. Sore eyes. And oh so tired. Even so, we visited some friends for lunch and had a nice day. I am glad it's nearly over though. x x
We had a lovely day yesterday. Dh stayed home to get on with garden jobs while I took the children to our local wildlife park with my best friend Dawn and her two children A who is 14 and R who is 8. It was bitterly cold but being with our very best friends we could have been in a cardboard box and still had a good time. I met Dawn when I was 11 when we first started secondary school. We've been through a lot together and still extremely close now. She's kind of my soul mate. Someone I can spend hours with chatting about nothing and never get bored. Time whizzes by and in a flash its time to go home.
Anyway, it was totally freezing all day with snow on and off but the children were having such a great time and to be honest,.. So were we despite the cold. After six hours of pacing the park in minus temperatures and an hour standing waiting for then to finish in the play area, we really had to go home. Our bodies could no longer cope with the cold.
We said or goodbyes with the agreement that Dawn and the children would come to our house for the day next Friday. They live an hour and a half away... Where we used to live... So visits are normally few and far between... And with N and her recent anxieties it's been hard to get her to travel more than half an hour.
I'm assuming it was due to the cold of yesterday that made me wake up feeling like I felt this morning. Still freezing. Achey. Sore eyes. And oh so tired. Even so, we visited some friends for lunch and had a nice day. I am glad it's nearly over though. x x
Sunday, 31 March 2013
Too much shouting!
So, dh and I have been in huge discussions this evening... And yesterday evening too. We've been discussing our family and all that's wrong with it right now. The main thing is the shouting. We all shout and its really getting me down right now.
Before the children got to 2 (ish) and 4 (ish) dh and I never shouted. We never argued with each other.... Rarely even had heated conversations. So what changed? The children started having arguments, we moved areas so dh was commuting a long distance so he was more tired and grumpy and I was (at the time) working 3 days a week and studying for two and exhausted. So with all that going on we got grumpy and shouty... and so did the children.
You see, children learn by example. So they were learning that if they weren't happy with something then you shout. The more they shouted, the more we shouted.... And so it had continued.
But now the children are nearly 8 and 10 and the shouting is getting louder and more ferocious. So something needs to be done. And it needs to be done now.
So dh and I have just made a pact that we will try to parent more gently and to try and not shout any more. Easier said than done after all these years.... But we can only try.
Before the children got to 2 (ish) and 4 (ish) dh and I never shouted. We never argued with each other.... Rarely even had heated conversations. So what changed? The children started having arguments, we moved areas so dh was commuting a long distance so he was more tired and grumpy and I was (at the time) working 3 days a week and studying for two and exhausted. So with all that going on we got grumpy and shouty... and so did the children.
You see, children learn by example. So they were learning that if they weren't happy with something then you shout. The more they shouted, the more we shouted.... And so it had continued.
But now the children are nearly 8 and 10 and the shouting is getting louder and more ferocious. So something needs to be done. And it needs to be done now.
So dh and I have just made a pact that we will try to parent more gently and to try and not shout any more. Easier said than done after all these years.... But we can only try.
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